Life Itself

We initiate strangely, you and I. We start, we stop. We push, we pull. We move with caution, you and I. We spring, we regress. We watch, we suggest. We hit reality, you and I. We recoil, we leap. We reconcile, we grieve. We move on, you and I. We laugh, we regret. We pretend, we forget.

Lately, I have gotten so used to posting everyday that the sudden gap on this blog has left me a little unhappy. And no, I haven't developed a writers bloc or suddenly found myself too busy. Rather, I have had too many thoughts on my mind. When my mind works at this speed, I cant slow down and put things down on paper. So on days like these, I just let myself be, ponder over and over, sulk a little, and then move to the next day.  How do you categorize things that are so far apart, so abstract and so complicated? How do you successfully preserve every thought, without losing the free spirit that guides it?  Since, I clearly don't know how, today I am just going to write about random things on my mind.  1) Premonition: This thought has been on my mind for a number of days now. A conversation with someone brought it up and I think about it pretty often. Is premonition possible? Can we really sense things before they can happen? Very often, I feel things that I believe exist, e

It's always heart warming to meet someone who's been in the same space as you. Someone who understands what you are saying because he or she has experienced it first hand. But. Our brains are so easy to trick. All someone needs to do is talk about something that is even slightly important to us and we go crashing down hill. Sometimes I wonder how many people misuse this basic human need of belonging. We meet new people so often. How is one to know that they aren't just feeding on our weaknesses. How can one say for sure that the person you met yesterday is not using the information he has on you to manipulate you? Maybe it's naive to not ask these questions before giving parts of yourself to someone. Maybe it'd take a paranoid mind to even stumble upon such a thought.

I have always held one belief close to my heart. People can never be forgotten unless someone else comes and takes their place. It's near impossible to get over someone unless you get distracted by another human being.  Only question is - how easy are you to distract? With my short attention span, this come quite naturally to me. I can be totally hung over someone one day and completely over them the next.  What doesn't come naturally to me is actually staying in one monogamous space, without feeling the need to meet new people or have more refreshing experiences.  Maybe one of these days someone is going to come along with the ability to keep my attention. Someone who can effortlessly keep me focussed and engaged. That or, I'll just simmer and settle. 

I wonder about you  Sometimes I miss your poetry Sometimes I long to hear you  Sometimes I crave for completion Sometimes Only Sometimes

There are some things that only your mother knows about you. No matter how much anyone else may try, it's impossible to gain that depth of understanding that a mother has about her child.   I have always known this to be true. A few days back my mother said something that proved it all over again.   She pointed out the fact that I have crazy will power. That once I decide something, no one can change my mind.  My mothers favourite illustration involves my giving up thumb-sucking. I was one year old and my parents had tried nearly everything: putting spices on my finger, tying them with bandage, telling me a hundred stories. As you may imagine, they failed miserably. Then one day my father looked at me, pointed at my teeth and said "Zoya all your teeth will fall out!". I simply confirmed if he has being serious and needless to say, that was the last time I sucked my thumb. At this point of her story telling, my mother usually recounts her fear at how crazy my will powe

He doesn't understand me I only hope that he does He doesn't comprehend my silence I only believe that he does He doesn't see me sparkle I only crave that he does He doesn't like me for who I am I only need that he does He doesn't belong with me I only pretend that he does.