That moment, when you have tried every trick in the book, including the very trick that the book advises you never try: being completely honest - and nothing comes of it. That sensation of inching doom, when you have done all you could, other than giving up - and got nothing in return. That uneasy frustration, when you have written, screamed, silently begged - and the only person who heard you is yourself. That awkward brush of reality, when you admit that every effort has been in vain - and only go back into self denial.