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Stranger, what's your motive?

It's always heart warming to meet someone who's been in the same space as you. Someone who understands what you are saying because he or she has experienced it first hand.

But.

Our brains are so easy to trick. All someone needs to do is talk about something that is even slightly important to us and we go crashing down hill. Sometimes I wonder how many people misuse this basic human need of belonging.

We meet new people so often. How is one to know that they aren't just feeding on our weaknesses. How can one say for sure that the person you met yesterday is not using the information he has on you to manipulate you?

Maybe it's naive to not ask these questions before giving parts of yourself to someone. Maybe it'd take a paranoid mind to even stumble upon such a thought.

Comments

  1. Anonymous4 December 2010 at 14:51

    1. Paranoia is a healthy, God-given instinct. It is to be used.

    2. In lower forms of life, there are two types of symbiotic relationships: parasitism (where the parasite benefits at the expense of the host), and mutualism (where both organisms benefit). Ask yourself, which category does your "stranger" fit in (assess HIM/HER, and NOT only their motives, because they themselves MIGHT be unaware of their motives... for they may be acting on an instinct, and not on a plan). And in doing so, be aware that the benefit to you, versus him/her might be of different kinds (material, educational, emotional...); there is no common currency to compare the benefits. The mistake we often make when we say something like "Oh... he/she just USED me, or MANIPULATED me..." is often rooted in our inability to see the balance.

    3. All said, there ARE parasites... and they do leave you scarred. Often longer than your self-awareness might allow you to comprehend.

    - ASnonymous

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous4 December 2010 at 14:58

    PS (means Picchhon Sujjhi... in Punjabi): In addition to parasites, there are also pychopaths. They simply enjoy harming you. Their only "benefit" is this enjoyment.

    Haven't figured out which one despise more. Parasitism is rooted in evolution. Psychopathy is somewhat of a "new world" thing - part nature, part nurture.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Zoya Brar6 December 2010 at 11:34

    I guess parasitism is slightly better than psychopathy. Also, on some occasion or the other, we have all been a bit of both. So perhaps, there is always a chance that a relationship is skewed towards one person. In most cases, we knowingly let other people take advantage of our weaknesses.

    ReplyDelete

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